Monday, April 27, 2009

Unemployment Grief Counselor

I realized something funny last week as layoffs continued at the company that I wasted five years of my life at. As soon as someone gets laid off they call me. Literally I am the first phone call they make, before they break the news to their parents or roommates, they call/e-mail me to tell me the news and the e-mail usually ends with "so now we can hang out all the time". First of all, I didn't want to hang out with you when I worked with you (and thought I made that crystal clear at the time) so now that I am not forced to socialize with you I will not be taking time out of my freedom-filled, enjoyable life to do so. Second of all, I am not sitting around doing nothing waiting for people to call me to hang out. I'm actually much more productive now that I don't have a corporate job and actually do a lot less going out. But in all seriousness I think there could be a career in this unemployment counseling. People call me to get the POV of someone who has gotten laid off and couldn't be happier about it. So I tell them about how much better their life is going to be and all the things they are going to be able to do, also where they can get $7 Bud Light pitchers on a Monday night (I have to go out once in a while). The sad thing is that most people are more freaked out by the thought of going to the gym everyday and pursing jobs that they actually like that they jump right back into crappy, dead-end jobs that make them miserable. Oh well, all I can do is try, the faster they get jobs the sooner they'll stop calling me to hang out anyway

1 comment:

  1. I think you've got something here about the demand for unemployment grief counselors. I was laid off back in January, and I'm also the first person many people call who follow in my jobless path. Awesome - when they think of out of work and sitting on one's ass all day, they think of me. But I absolutely agree with you about the peace and happiness that comes with being laid off. I'm going on 4 months of joblessness (and spent 3 years in a job I hated), and can honestly say that it's better to stay unemployed for as long as you can afford rather than taking a shitty job that's just gonna make you miserable for the next 3 or 5 or 10 years.

    ~Unemployed and Fabulous